Forgiveness? Love? Change? (oh dreaded change!) More of the same abuse, neglect or manipulation maybe?
Whether we are in a place where we are supposed to leave something behind for our own wellbeing or in a place where walking in to something could bring great healing, we are facing an open door.
Do we get so comfortable in our own 'stuff' that when someone presents to us an opportunity to grow within ourselves, we are too afraid or skeptical to walk through? What if they hurt us again? What if it's not real? What if I have to let go of control? What if I have to apologize???? (ouch - that's a big one!) There are so so so many 'what if's' out there!
Or maybe it's that we are so used to the way things are that we have resigned ourselves to more of the same and in effect put ourselves in a metaphorical jail cell with the door open... hating it... wishing, hoping and praying for something different... yet afraid to leave the cell?
However we feel about those open doors, we do indeed find what we're made of - whether we walk through or not.
I have found that as I continue to grow and let go of all that stuff that weighs me down - you know, the kind of stuff that we either can't change or control or even predict - the more freedom and peace I feel inside.
For me, with my past and my history, the things I have done and the things others have done to me, I could not have done it nor continue to do it without Jesus. Somehow, He just comes along and says "Hey, you're valuable to me, I died for you to be free, so let me carry this burden for you". He meets me exactly where I am - usually at the end of myself lol, all broken, emotional, fearful and beating myself up pretty good (we are so often our own worst enemies... sigh!).
I'm not trying to dismiss or diminish anything any of us have gone through - some of it is horrific stuff! - but I know this... like I KNOW from experience kind of know... Whatever we give to Him, He will actually redeem us from. He lifts us up and turns all our worst nightmares and the things that haunt us, into something good and great and we see a purpose in it and through it. Something far far better than we could have ever hoped or dreamed!
And with time, with discovering who Christ really is and who we really are IN Him, we use what we've endured to help others and to glorify God. His strength and His love becomes ours. And it's sometimes an amazing, awesome, heart wrenching process and experience. But the FREEDOM on the other side when we walk into that open door and feel that love and peace for ourselves... well, it's like nothing you've ever felt before! That love, that peace, that joy and that freedom - that alone is worth the fight!