something like "I think the enemy has given up on us now" to which I replied with something like "Don't be so sure... He's gonna come after us even stronger after we're married."
We had experienced so many things and people who had tried their damnedest to rip us apart as a couple and yet we made it to our wedding day so much stronger than we used to be. We endured a LOT!!!!
We came home from Squamish a married couple on Sunday evening, dropping the girls off at their dad's place, venturing home to continue our lives... no different, just married now.
On Monday, Steve went to school as normal. I had massage therapy, which I was so grateful for!! I spent the afternoon doing laundry, writing, going through wedding pictures, ordering prints and was arranging a beautiful dinner for the two of us - our first meal as a married couple in our home.
About 2 minutes after Steve walked in the door from school and while he was in the process of putting his bags down, his phone rang. It was a family member calling to congratulate us on our wedding and at the same time apologize for a post that another family member had made. We hadn't seen it yet. We were completely unaware. And as soon as we saw it, both of us were shaking with anger. Our "honeymoon" (which is basically just 5 days without the kids home) was over. Reality once again smacked us in the face.
Steve started dealing with that family member and we started fortifying our boundaries once again. I was so incredibly hurt by it all! I sat there in tears. After ALLLLLLL the crap we had been through together and while I truly love Steve, I could not help but question what kind of family I had married in to and dreaded living the rest of my life like this. (Oh, and we never had our dinner... It's still in the fridge...).
In the process of this, Steve deactivated his Facebook account temporarily to give himself some breathing space to think and pray. During this time, a friend in California noticed Steve wasn't on Facebook anymore and decided to lash out at us both, believing that Steve had unfriended him on Facebook. But at the time of lashing out, Steve had actually reactivated his Facebook account and had dealt with the two family members who had been causing us continual and unrelenting grief over the last two years.
We woke up this morning with a sense of peace. We had stuck together, although it was NOT easy to do so! And we had dealt with what we needed to do and we were carrying on with our lives now.
Then we had a notification on Facebook and our Californian friend had made just the most vile and vicious comments to us - telling us we were bible thumping hypocrites as well as sooooo much more and finally telling us to both fuck off. Well, that was pleasant!
My point with this story is not to air dirty laundry but to give a real life example of how the enemy TRIES to attack and divide. There is no one more against YOU or YOUR marriage, whether you are Christian or not, than Satan! Two are definitely more powerful than one.
And as Christians, we are supposed to recognize the spirits at play NOT the people at play... God does not hate the sinner, He hates the sin. He LOVES the sinner. Jesus did not have time for the pharisees who were so stuck in their "rightness"... Jesus spent his time with the sick, the poor, the prostitutes, the sinners, the tax collectors (who, if you're aware of bible knowledge, actually have their own 'classification' and were deemed worse than 'sinners').
Jesus however was not stupid either... He was very aware of the spirits against himself and took appropriate measures to protect himself. He spent time with His Father and with the Holy Spirit. So must we. We need to guard ourselves against the spirits sent to attack us, demoralize us, defeat us, distract us etc. And sometimes that means distancing or even cutting yourself off from those who have those spirits. There is nothing more demoralizing as constant negativity and manipulation.
Do NOT be afraid to walk away from those who's behaviour consistently brings YOU down. Be around those who lift you up and speak LIFE into you. Be around those who are actually FOR YOU... not for what they can get from you... but those GENUINELY interested in YOUR success, without their own selfish motives attached to it. People who WANT to give YOU glory and see YOU shine because they actually have YOUR best interest in their heart and seeing YOU excel fills them with pure joy.
In our story above, we recognize the spirits at work and we know the source of those spirits. Our friend in California does not have the same spirit as the two family members who have now been cut off. One is a one shot, lashing out deal. The others are consistent and constant. One relationship we will seek to 'calm', for lack of a better word. The other two we can no longer tolerate. But for ALL we will pray. And sometimes that's all you can do. God is certainly much bigger than we are and a whole lot more powerful. And He sees the heart of people... and out of the heart comes the motive...